Parents may assume that the transition from foster care to adoption will be smooth and welcome, but that is not always the case. In this course, we talk with Jayne Schooler about what parents need to know to support their child during this transition.  Jayne is the author/co-author of seven books in the adoption field, including Wounded Children, Healing Homes: How Traumatized Children Impact Adoptive and Foster Parents. She has worked in orphanages in Kyrgyzstan, Poland and Ukraine.

This course covers the following topics:

  • Two different scenarios: 
    • You are the foster parents of the child you are going to adopt.
    • You are adopting a child who is living with another foster family.
  • At what age do kids understand the idea of adoption?
  • If you are adopting a child you are fostering.
    • How is adoption different from fostering?
    • What are some typical emotions (positive and negative) a child might feel? Grief is to be expected.
    • How far in advance should the child be informed?
    • What are some typical behaviors you might see?
    • What are some typical emotions and behaviors you might see from other children already living in your home?
  • If you are adopting a child that is living with another resource family or group home.
    • What are some typical emotions (positive and negative) a child might feel?  Grief is to be expected.
    • How far in advance should the child be informed?
    • What are some typical behaviors you might see from a child that is moving to yet another home and another parent?
    • What are some typical emotions and behaviors you might see from other children already living in your home?
  • What are the pros and cons to changing the child’s name? First name, middle name, last name?
  • What can parents do to help their child transition from foster child to adopted child? Some of these will apply to a child you are fostering and some to a child who you are not fostering.
    • Get all the information on the child that is available from his file, caseworker, and previous foster parents.
    • Decide what type of relationship you can have with your child’s birth family? Come up with ways to help your child maintain safe connections to their biological roots.
    • Go slow.
    • Give the child as much voice in the process as possible.
    • Anticipate problems and come up in advance with ways to work through them and outside resources to use.
    • Create a lifebook for your child and use this book to help explain some of the differences between foster care and adoption?
    • Prepare children already in the home for an adjustment period and how kids who have experienced trauma might behave.
    • Think in advance how you will maintain a tie to her cultural, racial, or ethnic roots.
    • Identify support for yourself. You will at some point likely feel discouraged, frustrated and maybe even regretful. Where will you turn for support?
    • Rite of passage at finalization.
  • What to do if the tween or teen does not want to be adopted? What other options are available outside of adoption?


*Your course will remain active for 180 days from purchase date.